Beth and Traci Emerge

46

. . . from Convergence, where we were clued in immediately by one of the fine emergent Christian ladies that this event would be sriracha for our chicken-noodle diet.

Observe:

Traci: I’m an atheist.

Tiffany: Oh thank God. Christian women can really get on my nerves.

Beth and Traci: Sometimes a Great Notion

6

By some force that transcends all understanding, Traci and I will fly out of snowy, icy Indy tomorrow to attend a Christian women’s conference in Oregon. I’m a bit dazed by the way this plan so spontaneously sprouted wings. One morning someone (Sarah? Helen?) told me about Women’s Convergence, and I got the notion to look it up. Within five minutes I checked Expedia and emailed Traci. Within five hours Traci and I were booked and she was asking to borrow a Bible for the flight there. Crazy.
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Beth and Traci: Only So Good

163

Sue, upon regaining her composure after finding out that an atheist was sitting three feet away during bible study at College Park Church: “One of my daughter’s teachers was an atheist. I didn’t know for the longest time because she was so sweet and loving.”

Awkward silence.

Beth: “Did you ever ask her why she was so good?”

Sue: “I did actually. It was just in her. That was the way she was intended to be. She could only be so good, though.”

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Beth and Traci: David, Bathsheba, and Kay Arthur’s Sweet Thigh

34

“It writes itself, yesterday’s event,” Traci said of the College Park Church Precepts inductive Bible study last week. Some of Traci’s ideas for post titles follow.

Beth and Traci Had Better Get Right with God
Beth and Traci and Kay Arthur’s Sweet Thigh
Beth and Traci and God’s Rod (Real mature, Traci.) The study leader said it! — Traci Yeah, but not the way you whispered it in my ear! –Beth
Beth and Traci: Only So Good
Beth and Traci Eat, Drink, and Lie
Beth and Traci: Don’t be a Saul
Beth and Traci and 90% Hussies
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Beth and Traci: What’s a Bad Weave?

18

Saturday morning at Eastern Star, break it down
Break it down, Yeh

Women of the Word on the East Side of Indy
Two white lumps in a hot cup-a-joe
Men and women gracious hosts
Brother Robert, Sister Sherri, Sister Rita
Extending hands, sharing names with crashers
We all meet in the middle, pray in a circle holding hands
Brother prays, family thank the Father, the Giver
“Yes, Jesus, we thank you,” agreeing whispers,
for rice and beans, hash browns, sweet potatoes
Servants serve us breakfast, no meat, Lenten fast
Four days into the fast – “WOO!”
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