Beth and Traci: Your Christ Here
Posted by Traci in category Beth and Traci go to Church on March 20, 2008
What’s that gaggle of suburban moms in aisle 5? Why, it’s an Easter candy buying frenzy.
I take my paper towels and creme hair colourant (the “u” in the middle spells fancy) to the register. Behind me a woman unloads her cart of candy and my eye rests on a milk chocolate cross with — God help me, is that a chocolate Jesus strung up on the thing?
No, it’s flowers.
Phew.
Nothing says “thanks for the salvation” like an execution device rendered in chocolate, but a candy Jesus would be in poor taste.
Comment by: Claudia
1 03/20/08 8:11 AM | Comment Link |Tom Waits doesn’t think so!
Comment by: JM
2 03/20/08 9:17 AM | Comment Link |I realize this is sooo last Easter, but it has been done on a large scale.
Also, check out Alejandro Jodorowski’s The Holy Mountain, a brilliant work of post modern surrealism and psychedelia that would have given us a nice break from listening to Maggot Brain over and over again back in the day. The filmmaker is cast (as in plaster) as the Christ on the cross and mass produced, at least once in delicious frosted cake. Which he eats.
The movie is worth it just for the reenactment of the conquering of the Aztecs using frogs.
Comment by: JM
3 03/20/08 9:22 AM | Comment Link |And because I don’t want to drive to Long Beach, there is also this to ponder in the way of Christian confection.
Really, it’s about the recipe for Rachel Ray’s Easter mix in the comments.
Comment by: pamhogeweide
4 03/20/08 9:39 AM | Comment Link |yeah, i’ve seen the chocolate cross thing. argh.
the cross symbol has been so commercialized that it’s lost it’s sacred meaning. it is a symbol of death, of violent death for sure; but for Christ followers it is also a symbol of love, a reminder that the God we believe in by faith showed up in human form and then got the sh*t kicked out of him on the cross. This is seen as an act of love in our system of beliefs because Christ took on himself all the crime of humanity. His execution for crime was a metaphor, a symbol of taking care of justice for crime (aka sin) by the whole of humankind.
And this is why I can’t buy chocolate crosses or glitzy diamond cross jewelry or campy seashell crucifixes sold in seaside gift shops. It’s way too casual for a symbol that for me is very meaningful.
So yeah, we’re both incredulous about a chocolate cross. For different reasons, but yeah, no milk chocolate crosses at our houses!
Comment by: benjamin ady
5 03/20/08 9:57 AM | Comment Link |Gotta love capitalism, huh?
How much cocoa used in the chocolate produced for consumption in the U.S. around easter time is fair trade, and how much is produced by slave labor in some west african nation?
Of course, like heterosexuality, slavery is clearly promoted in the bible, right?
Comment by: April Terry
6 03/20/08 11:11 AM | Comment Link |How ’bout a nice Jesus pencil topper instead, complete with his plastic arms spread open wide?
See Pencil Topper here
Comment by: Traci
7 03/20/08 11:18 AM | Comment Link |I dunno, Pam. I think we actually are incredulous for the same reason. i don’t see how anyone can call it a sacred symbol and then make a snack of it.
More Peter to the eater, JM. More power to the pussy.
Comment by: Claudia
8 03/20/08 12:26 PM | Comment Link |JM, thanks for the link in #2. Few things make me happier than reading the words “fumed Bill Donohue.”
Comment by: Lisa
9 03/20/08 1:18 PM | Comment Link |Traci, all I know is everything you write makes me laugh out loud. I would gladly help market your novel.
Comment by: Randy
10 03/20/08 2:08 PM | Comment Link |So…you guys would be offended by my Deluxe Jesus Action Figure with GLOWING HANDS and Five Fish and Two Loaves and a Jug of Water to turn into wine?
Yeah…Jesus kicks ass. My oldest son, who does not follow Jesus (of any variety) saw it in Hollywood and bought it for my birthday. It sits proudly in our dining room, in the original packaging of course.
It’s no edible Jesus, for sure, but it’s started several really interesting conversations around the dinner table with guests already!
Comment by: Helen
11 03/20/08 2:36 PM | Comment Link |Randy your son clearly loves you very much to buy you a present like that.
Happily I haven’t seen any chocolate crosses. Yesterday I saw a couple of grandmothers in the candy aisle of the drugstore having fun picking out candy for their grandchildren. I enjoyed seeing that. Of course I was just passing through that aisle on my way to pick up a prescription *ahem*.
Comment by: pamhogeweide
12 03/20/08 2:36 PM | Comment Link |actually, jesus action figures are cool. i took one to hong kong to give a friend of mine and she LOVED it!
but if it was an action figure of jesus on the cross, nah, that would be uncool in my house.
Comment by: Randy
13 03/20/08 2:47 PM | Comment Link |I guess technically if Jesus was on a cross he wouldn’t be much of an “action” figure…or very fun to play with.
Hey Pam…and this is totally unrelated…I’m getting a new tat tomorrow. A Scottish King’s Celtic Cross. Did a wedding for a couple that owns a local tattoo shop and traded out for ink. Life is good.
Comment by: benjamin ady
14 03/21/08 12:06 AM | Comment Link |I don’t really see what the huge difference is between a chocolate cross and … say … a bejewelled cross hung on a chain around a neck.
Why don’t people were bejewelled eclectric chairs around their neck?
Christians by and large, in my experience, seem to be out of touch with the fact that the crosses which so dominate their (our?) iconography were (are?) execution-by-means-of-torture devices. So why not chocolate?
Comment by: Tiffany Flaming
15 03/21/08 8:07 PM | Comment Link |Profound human rights violations have never been so delicious!
Comment by: Lisa
16 03/22/08 3:33 PM | Comment Link |Have you already seen this site?
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/11669242/
Comment by: Claudia
17 03/22/08 4:12 PM | Comment Link |JM beat you to it in post #2, actually…
Comment by: Lisa
18 03/22/08 4:24 PM | Comment Link |oops–I’m a skimmer. I’m hiding from the in laws and the basketball games trying to entertain myself.
Comment by: Helen
19 03/22/08 4:33 PM | Comment Link |I remember that Chocolate Jesus story from last year.
This morning, even though I haven’t seen chocolate crosses, I remembered that in the UK people have been making eating hot CROSS buns at Easter for a long time - maybe hundreds of years. Or maybe it came about in the Victorian Era since lots of traditions seem to date back to that time. Anyway so edible crosses at Easter are nothing new.
Maybe wikipedia has some facts about hot cross buns. It was worth reading that page for this funny story:
.
Comment by: benjamin ady
20 04/1/08 10:19 PM | Comment Link |Well, it’s been 12 days since a Beth and Traci post, and I’m going into serious withdrawal.
I’d actually be willing to pay, at this point, for a fix.
Help!
Comment by: Traci
21 04/2/08 7:15 AM | Comment Link |BENJAMIN: How much? We are totally for sale.
Actually, we’re in crisis mode at BaTHQ: Beth’s gone atheist. I KNOW! I never saw that coming, but now she’s all “alluring fairy tale” this and “Christopher Hitchens” that, and I can’t drag her to bible study. You know how zealous converts are.
Pray for me.
Comment by: benjamin ady
22 04/2/08 7:31 AM | Comment Link |Traci,
no–seriously? Because it would be like seriously … cruel for you to pretend about something like that, and get me all excited only to later say “Ha ha, just kidding”.
Christopher Hitchens *will* do that to one, won’t he? The man is *totally* freaking brilliant.
Although I can sort of see it being a problem for y’all’s church visiting project. “We’re two atheists who want to visit and write about your church” just doesn’t have quite the same ring as “We’re a christian and an atheist who are good friends who want to visit and write about your church. (with implied “maybe the atheist will convert”)”
Tell Beth to put Christopher Hitchens aside for a few days, and read some Brian Mclaren. If anybody can convince her to convert back, it’ll be him.
I don’t pray. But I’ll send some good vibrations your way =).
Comment by: Helen
23 04/2/08 10:16 AM | Comment Link |Traci, there’s only one way to salvage Beth and Traci now: to balance things out you need to become Christian!
Comment by: benjamin ady
24 04/7/08 7:44 AM | Comment Link |Traci,
Ok, I guess … you’re getting paid nothing now, right? So.
I’d pay $5 a month for a minimum of say … 8 posts, or approx. one every 4 days. A sort of subscription service.
I know that’s *seriously* undervalueing your writing. But I’m seriously broke. And I get even … Christopher Hitchens, as well as David H., for free on the web. I mean *somebody* is paying them, but not me. Think of it in terms of the widow’s two mites (ask Beth) =)
Comment by: Liz
25 05/4/08 1:22 PM | Comment Link |well, I guess I am safe. My hot cross buns are really more like hot BLOB buns. I just can’t get the frosting to do the right thing. But they taste good. I never really thought about the chocolate cross thing but you are absolutely right. I have seen them and it just didn’t register. I don’t wear Christian jewelry of any kind in part because I used to be Greek Orthodox and it leaves a bad taste there and in part because advertising and identifying by a symbol whether it is a bumper sticker, t shirt or nice piece of jewelry strikes me as cheesy. I do have a bracelet with the serenity prayer on it but that is more for my own personal thing than to advertise to others. I also have a cross tattoo but that is from a long time ago and I don’t really care to have it lasered off. I don’t know that today i would advertise my faith on my skin.
Comment by: Liz
26 05/4/08 1:26 PM | Comment Link |what I mean to say is that it seems sort of gimmicky, sort of a shortcut instead of merely asking the HS for the right words at the right time to connect to the right person. No one is going to be converted by a cross around someone else’s neck. Although years ago (when I felt differently about accessorizing in a Christian manner) I DID have someone ask me why a jew would wear a cross and what was my problem. I didn’t have things anywhere near as thought out as I do now so I doubt I said anything intelligent. Accesories and clothing for Christ just seem like a shortcut and a very low effort way to evangelize. And they make Christ seem less like God incarnate and more like another product to be sold
Comment by: Helen
27 05/4/08 4:07 PM | Comment Link |Thanks for your comments, Liz.
I’d like to see people show they’re followers of Jesus by their words and actions, so they don’t need to show it by what they wear.